As a self-admitted, life-long perfectionist, I have decided to embrace mistakes. I would like to say I am comfortable in this phase, but it is making me squirm. It may be the curse of the first born child, it may be trying to always make everyone else happy, it may be the fear of doing anything wrong... but it is all out the window. The start of this shake-up of my little life was in taking improv comedy classes. I have been attending for about 5 weeks now and I am terrible. It is the most embarrassing, challenging, uncomfortable experience I may have ever had and I can't get enough of it. I'm addicted to the failure of it all. It's beautiful! Yes and... it's defeating too. Yes and... it is wonderful. Yes and... (just kidding, you get it.) So then I thought, where else should I start failing? I'm not returning all phone calls, not doing laundry (just shopping instead), not cleaning the house like crazy, not saying no anymore to deliciously irresponsible things. I went to a concert until midnight last week! (That is crazy when I get up at 3:30AM.) I'm painting my toes a trashy fire red; doing yoga after wine; listening to my favorite album from high school; I am feeling out of sorts, selfish. It's weird. Am I having an interesting epiphany or a momentary lapse of my typically good judgment? I am thankful to have amazing people around me to lift me up. This is a photo of me with one of my girls, April. She's younger AND much wiser than me. :)
6 comments:
Jenn,
I'm wondering if you're doing all of this in preparation for becoming a mother and losing that oh so delicious spontaneity and independence?
Sounds like a mid-life crisis!
Great blog, Jenn! I wish I could follow in your steps...if only I didn't have so much laundry calling my name ;)
More power to you. Sometimes you just have to live a little.
Major props go your way from me. I am not too much of a perfectionist however I spent many years living to please and taking care of others. I have always been the responsible, dependable one but I have begun changing that as well. I need time for me. I need to do what I want and be a little irresponsible in the process. So keep getting out of your comfort zone and keep doing you. Its the best!!!
It sounds like you are living life to its fullest. There is always enough time to clean and be perfect. What makes you happier?
Enjoy while it lasts!!!!
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